This is the year I turned Forty. The Big 4-0! Seriously, this was monumental for me. A week before my birthday in June I broke my ankle, forcing me to cancel my 40th birthday plans. Actually I was quite relieved. I’d been practicing my genuine-happy-smile, and I wasn’t doing so hot faking the happiness which should accompany one’s birthday. Lets just say there was a lot of angst at the thought of having to stand in front of my friends and pretend to feel good.
Not that I think God had anything to do with my broken ankle, but I know he sure used the recovery time I was forced to endure to work in my heart. Laying on the couch for three months, mostly helpless and in pain, I had much time to reflect through the haze of codeine about life and all things 40. I decided on the date of September 30th to be the day I turned 40, and it was with mixed emotions that I greeted the day.
I was most definitely nervous, but I knew of a fair number of people who would be there and I was really looking forward to seeing my bestie who was driving over. There was no way of knowing just how amazing the evening would turn out. It turned into an amazing evening, maybe the free flowing booze had something to do with it, but on reflection it was a superb gathering.
As the hangover wore off the following day, I realised I was 40, and I was still me. I’m not 20 anymore, or even 30, and that is ok. Well, maybe I wouldn’t mind being 30 for another decade, but I certainly can’t stomach the thought of going through my 20’s again. I may not be as thin as I’d like, the fine lines may be creeping in, and my womanly parts may be going a bit crazy, but over all I am doing really well… Except for the damn ankle!!!
40 was a hard pill to swallow, I took it like a cat refusing it’s medication. At the end of it all, I worked myself up for nothing and still had to take it! But I’ve found out it wasn’t really that bad after all. I may not be where I thought I would be at 40, but I like where I am. I am happy with who I am and who surrounds me. I have the most amazing husband in the world, the most beautiful little girl, two awesome step-children, and the most amazing friends and family anyone could ask for spread over three continents and several time zones. After all my moaning and bitching, Forty and I made friends and will be happily walking together throughout the next decade!