A year and a half ago I was in Egypt. Our trip there marked six months left on our visa to live in the UK. Due to what was basically an illegal law change, we had to leave after five years and could not apply for Leave to Remain (to become citizens). This was not our original plan. In fact we had no contingency plan. But I had my faith!
I believed God had called us to London for a reason. We were the happiest we all had ever been and London became our home, not just physically but deep within our hearts. Finally I had found a place where I fit in, I was growing spiritually, surely God wanted me to stay. The entire visa situation would suddenly be changed at the last minute, we would get to stay, and I would have a fabulous testimony on the power of prayer!!
February turned into March, April passed into May, June ended and I stared into six weeks remaining until we would return to Seattle and I suddenly became angry. Angry with the government. Angry with the US. Angry with God. Angry.
Along with my hope my prayer life was gone. Anger became sadness, despondency, and eventually anger became six months of depression.
When we arrived in Seattle, God and I were still on speaking terms. There were lots of words, emotions, feelings. In the end, our conversations terminated with me saying, “Just give me six months to wallow in my self pity.” God did.
October, November, December, January, February, March…
Sometime in March I heard, very clearly, the word move spoken through the haze of my depression and anger. My depression was lifting, my head clearing, my reason returning. Yet the anger was still there, softened by the months of depression and wallowing, but still there. God was awakening me again, stirring my heart, pushing me to break out of where I was.
Along with His word, there were signs: a sermon at church, a new prayer partner met randomly at the gym one day, and an inner hunger for the word of God. I knew I was no longer angry, I knew God was moving in my life, moving me toward something better, something new, and I began to pray.
Over the last few months I have been praying. Praying at all times, in all ways, for all sorts of things, for nothing at all. I’ve just prayed. Regardless of what I have been praying for, or the outcomes of those prayers, I’ve been praying to get closer to God. My prayers have been a cry, a yearning for closeness once again to the Creator, and they have been very, very successful in reestablishing our relationship.
Prayer is about relationship between you and your Creator. It is something Jesus modeled for us, taught us how to do in Matthew 6:9-11. Prayer is the way we align ourselves with God’s will for our lives. Prayer is not meditation, although we can meditate on God’s word. So much of the time we spend praying we spend asking for things. While God is our father, he also desires a relationship with us that is deeper then merely giving us things we ask for. Prayer is that channel.
How do you get close to God?